December 27, 2006

Hi Sweet Baby…
Mommy is kind of sad today.

I keep thinking about your Daddy and what he is missing not being part of your life. It really is HIS loss… But, I can’t help but feel that it is also your loss.

I had a wonderful Daddy. I wanted that for you too. I feel like I have let you down in that department.

I am sorry.

I just want you to be sooo happy, and not have any bad feelings about him or his choices.

You are such a gift in my life. I feel very blessed. I can’t wait to be your Mommy…

I Love YOU Sooo Much!
Love Mommy

December 17, 2006

Hi Baby Zane…

Mommy doesn’t feel very good today.

I threw up last night and today. I am not sure why… maybe something I ate. I feel you moving inside my tummy right now. You are usually pretty active at this time (7:00pm).

I want to tell you that your father did apologize for the way he treated me… and I think in the back of my mind or the bottom of my heart I had hoped that he would say…

December 15, 2006

Good Morning, Sweet Baby Zane

I did something today that I didn’t think I would do.

I forgave your father. I did this not for him, but for me. When you forgive someone who has done you wrong you do two things…

you release the negative that holds you back and you empower yourself.

I walked on the beach after and I felt really good. I felt happier and less unsure about what may happen in the future. PLUS! I get Karma brownie points *laugh*.

I love the beach, the beach is...

This is an excerpt from the book I Wrote: Letters to Zane
Available September 2007

December 13, 2006

My Sweet Baby Zane,
Mommy’s tummy hurts today!

Not from being sick but from all the shots! I am sooo glad it is almost over… after Christmas I won’t have to do it anymore and I can finally let my poor tummy heal. I have sooo many bruises from the shots that I am running out of spots to give my shots in.

This Sunday I will be 6 months/24 weeks pregnant. Time is really flying now...

December 1, 2006

Good Morning My Love
The more I feel you moving around inside me the more excited I get. I can’t wait to hold you!

I just gave myself my daily shot in the tummy and it hurts! I got a baby book for you the other day…